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#DearHubby: A Love Letter to My Future Spouse 

On October 24, 2014, following an inspiring bible study on the topic of “The Unloved Woman”, I decided to write a letter to my unknown husband-to-be. I’ve gone back and forth on my decision to share it for the simple fact that it’s his letter and was originally intended for his eyes only. But, I gotta.  I guess this is what happens when your wife-to-be is a writer. Lord, bless him! Here’s what I wrote to my boo thang (giggles). I hope there’s another woman or man out there like myself who can relate to this post and finds it timely and refreshing.

Hey Dear,

I went to bible study tonight and returned home feeling both blessed and a mess! The speaker brought a word to us on “The Unloved Woman” and broke it down, identifying the why and this unloved woman’s characteristics. She said an unloved woman is dangerous because she is likely to cause harm. There are 6 types of this woman, and I identified with “the single woman never loved properly”. This woman says they don’t want or need things as a cover up. She doesn’t believe it’s genuine. Dang, that was me.

I received the word that FAITH HAS A VOICE. I realized that all of my “waiting” was due to a lack of faith. I’ve been saying I don’t want, what I do want. I’ve been nonchalant and complacent. The speaker has this ministry for single women. They (we) made baskets full of goodies for our husbands-to-be. Mine of course, is for you dear ☺. Before I let you dive in, I want you to know that I’m doing what’s necessary to get right, and tonight’s exposure was a great first step. God’s going to heal me for you. You’re worth my time and I am too.

So, I got a basket. Initially I got it because even though I wasn’t sure if I wanted to do this whole marriage thing again, something in me knew it was right. So by faith, I will feel so right by the time it is full. I’m praying for you and me individually and collectively. I love you so much and truly want the best for you, so…I gotta do my part.

I don’t want you to have a broken woman. We will not awaken our love until it is time. I feel it won’t be long…so I’m working hard by submitting to God, being honest, and allowing him to make me whole.

Dear God, Please do not let my husband suffer on account of me. May I never blaspheme your word! Finding me as his wife WILL be good for eternity. 

I don’t want to be easy to love for just a while, I want to be easy to love for life. I bind the spirit of complacency. I submit to the Holy Spirit and say, “have your way, God.”

Any who…love you.

xoxo,
yo ☺

#Life, #Love, & #Heaven on #Earth

Hello loves! It’s been a while, I know, but good news…I’ve been growing tons and have a bit of it to share.  Since my last post, I’ve raised my standard of living quite a bit with attention to a couple of key areas that I’ve outlined. Now, let’s see if I remember how to write ha.

I feel the need to share this because I think people frequently admire or develop a bit of hate towards a person based on what we do not know. We covet another’s physical and spiritual gifts and blessings, without fully understanding why they have what they have or what they did to get where they are.  Few are ready and willing to make the necessary changes to come higher.  Noses get turned up at those with high standards, while bitterness festers in their heart as if salvation isn’t free. Friends, you have to know and embrace this as truth: You can have as much of your inheritance that you tap into. To whom much is given, much is required (Luke 12:48).  This is simply how I carry my cross, today.  Carry yours as you see fit.

music_notes“…Day and night they never stop saying:
‘Holy, holy, holy,

is the Lord God Almighty,’ 
who was, and is, and is to come.”

~ Revelation 4:8b (NIV) ~

MUSIC…

For years one type of fast that I have partaken of is a fast from secular music where for a period of time: days, weeks, month(s) progressively, I would replace all secular music I habitually listened to with worship music honorable unto the Lord (i.e. Contemporary Christian, Gospel, Christian Rap, etc.). As these fasts became easier, I noticed during them, that I also became stronger. I saw clearer. I heard better. I was further from the world and I was closer to heaven. That’s the goal, right?

This may come to a shock to some of you, but the angels in heaven are focused on eternal things that matter. They aren’t bumpin’ your favorite Kanye, Jay Z, or Beyonce jams. The fallen “angels” on earth however, are producing them (but that’s another post).

Media comes at us with junk whether we want to consume it or not. At some point we have to take responsibility for what we choose to filter.

Do you not know that your body is the temple (the very sanctuary) of the Holy Spirit Who lives within you, Whom you have received [as a Gift] from God? You are not your own, You were bought with a price [purchased with a preciousness and paid for, made His own]. So then, honor God and bring glory to Him in your body.

~ 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (AMP) ~

So, in raising my standard of living and finding a new expression of love for My Abba, aside from minimizing television watching and narrowing selections, I have chosen to toss out all of my secular music that does not honor God or heaven. Now this doesn’t mean I don’t sing a random hook that’s already been downloaded in my spirit or bop my head while shopping, but hopefully one day, I will be able to be a bit more “not of this world”. I’m a work in progress. For now, I am proud of me. The praises of God are considerably outweighing any other sound in my life. He is worthy.

Since we consider and look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen; for the things that are visible are temporal (brief and fleeting), but the things that are invisible are deathless and everlasting.

~ 2 Corinthians 4:8 (AMP)~

CAREER/EDUCATION…

I work in the legal industry, and recently, I was accepted into an outstanding paralegal program at a well approved university. Exciting, right? Yoddler_359_LargeYes, God is so kind.  God is kind because he honors our requests even when they are not necessarily best. The very day that I received acceptance, I was up late sharing intimate time with my Beloved, studying His word, and embracing His love. I suddenly became overwhelmingly saddened by the thought that in a few months, the bible I was holding would soon be replaced with a textbook. It would only be a year, but I couldn’t help but wonder in anguish how many souls that meant. In fact, I was praying fervently for a precious one that night!  If but one was lost, my heart would hurt forever.  The financial debt for career advancement was worth it, but the spiritual debt for potential hell advancement of God’s people? That is not.  One soul is too many.

 What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?

~ Matthew 16:26 (NIV) ~

I made the best destiny decision of my life that night. I decided to seek first, the kingdom of God, and trust God to add unto me the rest (Matt. 6:33). My heart is still smiling at this decision and the idea of my Heavenly Father receiving maximum glory for all of “my” accomplishments. I’m just striving to get more names written in the book of life.  I’m going hard before I go home.

“LOVE LIFE”…

I am mentioning this because my “love life” for lack of a more fitting description, seems to always be an amusing blog segment and I dare not let ya down haha. I am happy to say that I am currently single and open to being pursued. Last year, I was crushing, but not open, and I requested in hopes of not limiting God, just one solid year to just establish myself all-around. He has granted my request. He’s so sweet like that.

loveDelight yourself in the Lord,
    and he will give you the desires of your heart.

~ Psalm 37:4 (ESV) ~

All conceit aside, I am the strongest and most beautiful that I have ever been. The more I learn of my God, I learn of myself, and love me. I don’t hold the hands of time, but now seems like a pretty good one. In Christ I am assured that there is no need to rush on my end, for there is no delay on His; love is patient.

 [He said] I charge you, O you daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or by the hinds of the field [which are free to follow their own instincts] that you not try to stir up or awaken [my] love until it pleases.

~ Song of Solomon 2:7 (AMP) ~

“Rib Tip”#Wife #Husband #TheStory

So lately I’ve really been wanting to get into my word differently.  Not just randomly ya know? I mean, nothing wrong with that but I just want more.  I’m hungry.  I don’t mind bouncing around and re-reading this chapter and going back to that book, but it seems like it would all just stick differently after having read the entire thing.  I’ve never read the entire bible.  I’ve attempted many times, but just never seemed to complete the task.  I would all of a sudden get bored of some parts, couldn’t follow others as well out of sequence, or come across a certain book of the bible that just was not an easy read for me.  I know there are supplements and chronological bibles, and different versions…but I wanted something really suited for me, not just another suggestion that sounds up my alley, ya know?  You know those bible in a year plans?  Yea, it’s like I start, doing well, and then I take a detour.  Remember that movie, “A Bug’s Life”?  All of this reminds me of that part where the bug is flying and then loses focus because it’s attracted to the light and gets zapped lol.  Yup, I’m sick of getting zapped.

Hmm…maybe the free spirit in me just doesn’t have an appreciation for the “helpful” guide telling me to read these 3 chapters in Daniel on Tuesday when maybe I feel like reading James this Tuesday.  I spiced it up a bit and now I’m off the plan lol.  I can only do monotony in moderation.  All that being said…*drumroll*….I’ve began reading “The Story” by Max Lucado & Randy Frazee.  It’s just that too…a chronological bible in the form of a story.  Yes! I hope I’ve found a winner.

The Story Bible White

So in The Story, like the bible it starts with the beginning (Genesis) when God created the heavens, the earth, Adam and all that good stuff.  All of a sudden I became fascinated with this fact that I’ve known for years.  Fascinated with how beautiful it was for a woman to be created from such an awesome part of the man’s body that indeed does help and support, as us women are built and purposed to do for our husbands.  I love the picture that it paints.

“But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.”

As many of you probably know, the ribs surround the chest and in turn protect the body’s heart, lungs, and internal organs.  That’s a lot! Like the ribs, wives aid and protect their husbands in often the most gentle of ways.  His lungs which give him breath to live…and his heart, the origin of all matters of his being.  If those organs aren’t intact, neither is he. If he’s our leader and he’s not intact, shoot, neither are we.  That’s “one”.  That’s a great responsibility.  To be called a wife or a husband is such a high calling that I think gets taken way too lightly.  It’s never to early or late to start praying for your spouse.  You love them, right?  Prayer is the most loving thing you can do.  It covers a multitude.

Now, I was married years ago…yea yea yea but I don’t even feel like it.  I mean I recognize that it was big and it’s definitely one of those things that I would talk about in it’s entirety with my future husband, but It’s really like a childhood memory now, in the past.  I’m just sooo different from that girl back then, I’ve been single longer than I was ever married, and that ending was one of the best things that ever happened to me.  It brought me back to my first love appropriately and I began transforming and growing as I moved forward.  I’m new.  If you’ve ever moved forward, then you know very well that moving forward requires that you don’t look back.  God’s funny though, because then he’ll “bring you back” just to show you that you’ve moved forward.  So sweet, I love it.

But back to the rib.  So the rib is this super great part with a great role, right? but the fascinating part was that God created more than just a rib.  God created and entire being of it’s own.  A beautifully made woman perfectly suited.  I can see God now molding and shaping all the curves inside and out.  She went from good to great in His hands.  I’m sure Adam woke up like “heeeey” haha.  In the words of my best friend “Get you some of that” lol.

At my church, a man who desires and is looking for a wife is jokingly said to be “looking for a rib” haha. And so, whenever a guy is interested in me that I have no interest in, I jokingly say to myself, “Uh uh…I ain’t your rib!” We will not be making eye contact. You better pay attention to the sermon! lol…really though.

Now I’m no expert, but I do have pretty good relationship experience.  In thinking of how wonderful a man and a woman are apart, I can’t help but think about the beauty in them being together.  So here’s a “Rib Tip” If I may for singles like myself…

Fellas — If you want a good rib, I recommend you be a good and faithful steward and gardener in the small areas.  Take care of all that the Lord has already blessed you with.  While you do have to pursue and make your presence known, if she’s a wise woman you don’t have to try hard to get noticed.  A wise woman is not easily fooled and sees what matters.  It’s your choice to make that work for you or against you.  If she’s interested, I hope she’s praying for you.  If you’ve already found your soon to be rib, awesome!  Remember that loving her is truly loving yourself.  If you’re garbage, so is she.  If you don’t have it together, don’t expect her to either.

Ladies — The bible said a man findeth a wife, so if you’re looking for a man (or wearing nothing to get his attention), cut that out.  You are who you attract.  I don’t believe looking for him is your job.  Eve didn’t choose Adam, God chose Eve for Adam.  Let your man receive from the Lord on who his wife is.  Hold on to that truth…he’ll come.  And truthfully, who knows, he might already be there and you not realize it.  Some of the best relationships begin as friendships.  Pray that he finds you in God’s timing and that you are both prepared when he does.  Focus on loving the everlasting man you already have and should be your world, Jesus.  If you’re in a relationship, stay honest with yourself and your partner.  The second you recognize you’re not his rib, save the heartache and end it. It can turn into mess that God won’t bless.  Some days it’s annoying and you want your fairy tale prince to hurry up and awaken you from your slumber, I know.  But that’s not real, and you don’t want anything half-baked.  Easier said than done but just keep praying, sitting pretty, loving God, and loving people.  Forever is a long time – that’s how long you want with him, right? Well I promise this wait won’t be as long.  I love you and I’m praying for us.  Have a blessed day! 🙂