I’m surprised by my love for you
I didn’t realize there was much still there
But in the light of such tragic events
I saw glimpses that you still care
Not in entirety, but you’re not all cold
and it’s so refreshing to see
How God resides in parts of you
and ignites the God in me
It was nice to find you beautiful
It was nice to find you great
I’m praying for you, America
May God’s will be done in every state
© 2017 • Chan’tel Nikole Grayson
Resilient woman, how fine you are,
Taking out those knives drove in so far.
Resilient woman…so quiet, so gentle,
Never would have guessed that you could have went mental.
Resilient woman, How’d you get through?
Teach us, and pray for us, while we all pray for you.
Resilient woman, don’t give up now,
And don’t look back while your hand is on that plow.
Resilient woman, keep that smile,
Shine that light, this is all worthwhile.
Resilient woman, dry your eyes,
For this is all a blessing in disguise.
Resilient woman, don’t forget your praise;
A precious garment and weapon for all your days.
Resilient woman, keep your head held high,
And please don’t let it drop for just any ‘ol guy.
Resilient woman, I am you;
I am hope in the mirror as you face your truth.
So don’t ever doubt, all that you can be,
For God does miracles, just look at me.
© 2017 • Chan’tel Nikole Grayson
When the wound re-opens
It’s a time to heal
In a proper way
While being still
When the wound re-opens
We can’t ignore
The pain that aches
The heart that’s sore
When the wound re-opens
It’s our day
To choose to turn
Whichever way
And dig deeply
To the roots
And to the core
Dig deeper
Deeper
Deeper
MORE
When the wound re-opens
EXCAVATE
And may all we find
Be faced, making no escape
May our ashes turn
To beauty yearned
Filling us with joy
Over lessons learned
When the wound re-opens
Pray for humility
To submit unto
The Potter’s wheel
Pray that all that’s bad
Be chipped away
No matter how much it hurts
Or how much we squeal
When the wound re-opens
Hope for something new
That leaves us unrecognizable in the best of ways
To position ourselves for God’s wonderful plan
And bring Him glory all of our days
© 2017 • Chan’tel Nikole Grayson
On October 24, 2014, following an inspiring bible study on the topic of “The Unloved Woman”, I decided to write a letter to my unknown husband-to-be. I’ve gone back and forth on my decision to share it for the simple fact that it’s his letter and was originally intended for his eyes only. But, I gotta. I guess this is what happens when your wife-to-be is a writer. Lord, bless him! Here’s what I wrote to my boo thang (giggles). I hope there’s another woman or man out there like myself who can relate to this post and finds it timely and refreshing.
Hey Dear,
I went to bible study tonight and returned home feeling both blessed and a mess! The speaker brought a word to us on “The Unloved Woman” and broke it down, identifying the why and this unloved woman’s characteristics. She said an unloved woman is dangerous because she is likely to cause harm. There are 6 types of this woman, and I identified with “the single woman never loved properly”. This woman says they don’t want or need things as a cover up. She doesn’t believe it’s genuine. Dang, that was me.
I received the word that FAITH HAS A VOICE. I realized that all of my “waiting” was due to a lack of faith. I’ve been saying I don’t want, what I do want. I’ve been nonchalant and complacent. The speaker has this ministry for single women. They (we) made baskets full of goodies for our husbands-to-be. Mine of course, is for you dear ☺. Before I let you dive in, I want you to know that I’m doing what’s necessary to get right, and tonight’s exposure was a great first step. God’s going to heal me for you. You’re worth my time and I am too.
So, I got a basket. Initially I got it because even though I wasn’t sure if I wanted to do this whole marriage thing again, something in me knew it was right. So by faith, I will feel so right by the time it is full. I’m praying for you and me individually and collectively. I love you so much and truly want the best for you, so…I gotta do my part.
I don’t want you to have a broken woman. We will not awaken our love until it is time. I feel it won’t be long…so I’m working hard by submitting to God, being honest, and allowing him to make me whole.
Dear God, Please do not let my husband suffer on account of me. May I never blaspheme your word! Finding me as his wife WILL be good for eternity.
I don’t want to be easy to love for just a while, I want to be easy to love for life. I bind the spirit of complacency. I submit to the Holy Spirit and say, “have your way, God.”
Any who…love you.
xoxo,
yo ☺
I recently finished up one of Ron Carpenter’s teaching series titled, “What Makes A Man”, and found it to 
be wonderfully insightful. Initially the title brought some doubt about whether or not it was for me (a woman), but after hearing his introduction, I was convinced that he would share something that my heart was ready to receive. By learning “what makes a man”, it became clear to me, that which does not make a woman, and therefore, what a woman should not seek to make herself into. God has already done a great job. You, woman, are beautifully made and there is no flaw in you! (Song of Songs 4:7) My heart was stirred, and any competition within it was getting squashed in my prayer closet! Yaaaay! This night…I was hearing, I was receiving, and I was getting. my. life! God is truly for us.
“For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.”
~ Habakkuk 2:3 (NIV) ~
My attention was drawn to the somewhat controversial topic of a woman’s role. I want to flashback to Genesis and recall a story about us and for us. My goal is to stir your heart and make you think about God’s word in relativity to the way we live (mind, body and spirit). I’ve included many scripture references for you to do your own study (and I hope you do!). I encourage you to test the spirit delivering this message (1 John 4:1)! And If the truth stings, let it sting! It is a small cost for liberty.
Briefly about Adam…
Back in Eden, good ol’ Adam was placed there before Eve. With his God-given glory and dominion, he reigned slightly lower than the angels (Psalm 8:5; Hebrews 2:7). Adam was a man with great responsibilities, and therefore many requirements (Luke 12:48). He named animals and tended an entire “garden” stretching across the Middle East! It pleased God to watch Adam do his thang. He came from God, “looked” like God, and walked with God; like Father, like son. Gon’ Adam with yo bad self!
Briefly about Eve…
Without coincidence (on purpose, for a purpose), Behold! God had created the lovely Eve from Adam, for the purpose of help and companionship. The woman’s role then and now is to simply help the man with what he needs. Side note: This is why it is extremely important for a woman to choose a man who is Christ-centered and truly walking with God. A wise woman once told me that the real ones are not trying to convince you, they are doing it.
“And it was not Adam who was deceived by Satan. The woman was deceived, and sin was the result.”
~ 1 Timothy 2:14 (NLT) ~
Eve’s deception led her to believe that she was missing something. She sought after this forbidden knowledge and power that seemed harmless and good for her. She sinned, she tainted her legacy, and she placed her family in a position of struggle for life. We are descendants of her, and God has a word…
“To the woman he said, ‘…Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.'” ~ Genesis 3:16 ~
God spoke, and the fight of woman for the position of man began. Now singles, you may think the above scripture is only true for married women, but not so! You, my single sister, are married to the best of the best, God himself! Your devotion and submission is to the Lord, holy in both body and in spirit! (1 Corinthians 7:34).
I believe many feminist, “shero”, and anti-male movements are examples of Genesis 3:16; women attempting to change an order that was divinely set in place. Now I’m not knocking women’s rights; I am for me, and I know that my greatest and highest thoughts of myself cannot compare to God’s thoughts of me (Psalm 139:17). The concept that God exceeds us in every way must be grasped (Isaiah 55:8-9). It is extremely important for us to seek God to learn what is right before we cause a mess. Why cause a mess when you can enjoy rest in His will? Instead of fighting God and man, we as women need to arise and kill our flesh that attempts to control man and obtain something that does not belong to us. That my friends, is liberation!
“Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.”
~ Psalm 51:10 (KJV) ~
If us ladies are honest with ourselves and receptive to the word of God, then we agree that there are a whole lot of us Evelets running around at fault; both single and married. It is time to realign. Awake! Stop listening to the outside world and getting bound and entangled (See Galatians 5:1). You can do this!
“Keep me as the apple of the eye, hide me under the shadow of thy wings.”
~ Psalm 17:8 (KJV) ~
The truth of the matter is, whether or not the bible says go”this way”, we all have the free will to go “that way”, and when we 
do, although we become separated by sin, we will never ever ever be separated by the love of our Heavenly Father (See Romans 8:31-39). I’m not okay with that, though. I am in no way okay with a one-sided relationship on account of me. Relationships that only take and do not give are not rooted in love. Love keeps the commands of The Most High God, and God has spoken (John 14:15). Protest THAT!
Eve lost horribly and I refuse to lose like that. I may lose, but it will be God’s way, with a humble heart of surrender. It is time for us as women to position ourselves for the restoration of our proper place of worship in God’s kingdom as He purposed it. God uses those who are willing to be used. I believe God’s will looks different for all of us, especially since fewer men are unwillingly rising to their positions, but seeking and discerning His will is key. We may survive outside of God’s will, but only inside can we thrive.
“And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.”
~ Acts 4:12 (ESV) ~
“If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it.”
~ Luke 9:24 (NLT) ~
A couple of months ago I had a short interview with a close family friend who was writing a book on healing after painful experiences. He wanted to know how long it took for me to be healed and how I went about reaching that place of healing. My response was something like this:
I can’t really put a number on it. I’d love to think that I am 100% healed from x, y, and z, but the truth of the matter is, maybe just x and y…or honestly, maybe 80% of all three ha. I don’t know. Once you think you’re good, you undergo spontaneous triggers by something big or small…a month later…a year later…maybe even 3 years later (to each it’s own).
These triggers remind you, and may leave you disappointed or annoyed by the realization that dang, there’s still residue. Dang. There is still some healing, maybe even lots of healing left to be done. In my experience, from one trigger to the next, disappointment came when I misunderstood what not being completely healed really meant. I thought it was bad, but now I know that when you are willing to heal, the fact that you are not completely healed of something simply means that God isn’t done, not that we aren’t ready for ____________. So, if you’re triggered by something that reminds you that you still need grace and humility, and reminds you that you’re still a human who needs God, then good! We were created to need Him. You are not delayed in meeting, reaching, or receiving what God has for you. That my friend, is a lie from the enemy!
One must get uncomfortable enough to deal with the roots. One must get uncomfortable enough to allow God to dig beneath the messy surface where the beginning of your issues and pain lie.
In order to heal properly, you have to deal (with the pain) properly.” – Nu
If you’re on the path to healing, then you know that you get those full circle, déjà vu, divine do-over moments when _____________________ happens again. Except this time it doesn’t make you angry, it doesn’t make you cry, and it shockingly doesn’t affect you the way it has in the past. You figuratively (or literally if you’re like me) leap in joy at the felt sense of accomplishment that you have finally, at last have been stamped by the Lord as “Healed!”. Not!
I believe us earthlings (ha!) are never completely healed of any worldly ailments until we leave this world and enter into our true destination…Heaven. Ahhh…The beautiful place of no pain, sorrow, or frustration…just love and fruits – my fave! 😉 We should know though, that while here on earth…
“…neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” – Romans 8:38-39 (NIV)
I am convinced that healing is ongoing and not to be consistently associated with readiness for something new. God is not a God that withholds good things from people who love and obey Him.
“For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly.” – Psalm 84:11 (ESV)
Whoever you are, wherever you are, HOLD ON. You may not be 100% healed from x, y, and z, I don’t know, but we should certainly celebrate the fact that we’re making progress. My heart personally smiles when I understand me better than I did yesterday. It gives me a better shot at understanding you. By faith I am healed, today, tomorrow, and forever. I am pleased with me and He, from whom my help comes…as should you. So stay blessed, be encouraged, and HOLD ON! Love you.
xo,
Nu
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. – Proverbs 4:23
I had a vision last night and as much I don’t want to admit this gory thing…Isn’t that what a blog is all about?
In the vision The Lord showed me my heart and half of it was protected, but the other half was kind of outside of me and gnat-like bugs were swarming around it like it would an open piece of fruit. The sight of it was almost unbearable! My spirit squirmed. Gross! How could that be me?! I knew it was though, and I wanted out of this scary vision.
I knew what it meant. I needed to guard my heart. I needed to re-check myself. I needed to realize that I’m not exempt from the toxicity of this world. I am now convinced, and rightfully so, that we are all at risk for contamination if we don’t guard what flows into our hearts. For what flows in, will certainly flow out!
I don’t know about you, but I can’t afford it. Too many souls at stake.
I’m not a big t.v. person, but lately I’d been watching a lot more of it. Nothing crazily inappropriate or anything, but a little unwholesome stuff here and there, easily equates to a lot (or enough) of wholesome stuff! As I reflect…I then found myself listening to a little more secular music, reading a little more magazines, being entertained by a little more of those tweets and few more of those Instagram pics…Are you getting me?
Worldly stuff. Stuff that matters none! I’m so sick of “stuff” that I could just burn my phone right now! Ok, maybe not…I need it to blog 😉
…let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. – Matthew 5:16
As Christians, we need to make sure that we’re not blending with the world. Because when we do, we stop trending in the Kingdom of God. No bueno! Check, please!
Dreams, visions, and prophecies, are nothing to be worried or afraid about, especially when you have an active prayer life. I believe they’re just another form of God’s little ways of putting us earthly folks in the know of what’s really going on in the spirit-realm. They’re his way of putting things on our radar and prayer list. It’s God’s way of supporting us and showing us just how much he cares. When this happens, we should prayerfully seek Him for clarity and understanding.
I tend to get hard on myself, but you know what, as long as we live lives of repentance and accept the fact that we will always fall short. When we delight in The Lord and strive to get it right, whatever our “it” is, He will be honored.
Remember that Jesus paid our gory bill long ago. All we have to do is say, “Check, please!” and be willing to let Him pay yet again.
Love you and praying for us both!
