It’s nearly 4:45 p.m. (PST) and I’m waiting for my car to ship between the hours of 1-4 p.m. …ha! I know -__-
I just popped in to tell you that I’m surprising myself lately. I’m bolder, more assertive. It’s like it was always in me but something about this move is making it finally rise to the surface. I can dig it. I can dig it, forever. Let me give you an example…
The other day I asked to borrow my mom’s car…she let me and as I was heading out the door and saying “see ya later” to everyone, my dad jokingly asked, “Well, aren’t you gonna ask me if you can go somewhere?” I laughed and jokingly belted out a “Hell No!”. Hahahaha…I’m laughing all over again as I re-tell the story. It’s funny for a couple of reasons. 1) It was awkwardly uncalled for (I ended up telling a story afterwards in attempt to make it less awkward before heading out LOL..ay yi yi) and 2) Because if you know me, I’m not really one to curse and so when I do it’s usually hilarious or shocking…I’d have to categorize this as weird.
The thing is, I know, and someone else in the room could have very well recognized that that statement came from somewhere deep within. I wasn’t trying to be disrespectful (and they know me well enough to know that), but…it kinda was. I don’t care how old I get, when my dad or any elder asks me something, I do not plan on responding “Hell No!” lol. Nonetheless, I am indeed grateful for that moment. It feels good to be me. It feels good to say no, and well, “Hell No!” It weaseled in and set a tone like no other. I am really feelin’ this gift of holy boldness and I’m certain that I’m gonna need this me for the path that I’m on. Give me a couple of months, and I’ll have it all balanced and under control.
Continue to lift me up! Until then, I might just yell “Hell No!” to a checker asking me if I’d like paper or plastic simply because I can and don’t want either one. Oh wait, they only ask that in Virginia :(..waaah!
Just kidding 🙂 (about the crying part)